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Finally, the answer to why, when it comes to romance, women are coy and men are just clueless--explained from the micro standpoint. Who would have guessed that all of our sexual and social behavior, and even our physical appearance, could be attributed to what our tiny unseen reproductive cells are doing? But that's Quirk's thesis in this highly entertaining book from an Average Guy that's a fun read full of a-ha! moments for scientists and civilians alike. Learn facts about cheating you'll never see on "Jerry Springer," like how unfaithful females actually change the biology of their mates. Discover why most sperm couldn't care less if they never saw an egg, what makes men yell "woo!" in a feminine falsetto--very similar to the mating cry of the Siamang gibbon--and, most important, the surprising answer on what to wear to attract that alpha mate.

1. The Sperm and Egg Problem

2. Female Promiscuity Controls the Size of Your Testicles

3. What Women Want

4. Bodies and Resumes: What Makes Us Horny

5. Why Men Are Afraid of Commitment, Women Cautious about Consummation

6. A Do-It-Yourself Home Experiment

7. How Men Get Sex

8. The Catfight Gene

9. The Jerk Gene

10. Bower Birds Teach Us How Art Evolved to Get the Groupie

11. Male Promiscuity Decides Your Height

12. Why Women Are Coy, Men Clueless

13. Why You're So Horny

14. Darwinism: Survival of the Sexiest

15. How Kindness Became Sexy

16. Why We Bitch

17. Why We Are Fat

18. Aqua-Ape: The Missing Link?

19. Why You Like Spielberg More than T. S. Eliot

20. Let's Face It

21. Love Stinks

22. Faked Orgasms Fool Men, but Real Orgasms Fool Women

23. You Don't Have an Orgasm. An Orgasm Has You.

24. Why Your Clitoris Is Hard to Find

25. March of the Penguin Prostitutes

26. Free Love Causes War

27. Bimbos and Cuckolds: What Makes Us Jealous

28. Why You're Tormented

29. Dying for Sex

30. When Your Wife Sleeps with Your Brother,and You're Okay with That

31. Broad Hips, Big Butts; Broad Shoulders, Big Diction

32. Why Your Penis Is Easy to Find

33. Two Genes for Two Types of Gay Guys

34. Gay Animal Parents

35. Boobies

36. Homo Homo sapiens

37. Why Males and Females Don't Actually Exist

38. Why Men Have Nipples

39. The Sperm and Egg Solution

40. Falling in Love

Afterword

Notes

In Case You Think I'm Full of It: Bibliography

Useless Index

People Who Deserve Acknowledgement but not Payment

About the Author

JOE QUIRK is a sperm-spreading author who evolved from monkey business to monogamy when he married .He lives in Northern California with his wife and two cats he would like to kill.He is the author of the novel The Ultimate Rush.

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Wild Kingdom meets Dr. Ruth in Quirk's bawdy guide to species reproduction and the differences between men and women. Each topical chapter compares romantic relationships to sociological, biological, anthropological or zoological findings, all related in Quirk's off-the-cuff prose. The easy reading can be attributed to the fact that Quirk isn't a scientist, but a fiction writer with an interest in science and a knack for finding humor in explaining why people act the way they do. Chapter titles like "Why You're So Horny" and "Why You Like Spielberg more than T.S. Eliot" set the tone for Quirk's revelations on the purpose of body hair ("It's to stink ... Now we know why the French are so sexy"); promiscuity in the animal kingdom ("the faithful sex looks drab, and the slutty sex looks fab"); and art ("I look at Michelangelo's ceiling, and I see a gay man's erotic fantasies"). Men, Quirk writes, are "sperm spreaders" bent on spraying their worthless sperm as frequently and widely as possible, while women are "womb carriers" competing against one another to land the best sperm to fertilize a precious egg. Granted, Quirk's book is far from breaking new scientific ground, but his humorous touch (not to mention the chapter on penguin prostitution) make for a readable and off-beat treatise.Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

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Book Description

Finally, the answer to why, when it comes to romance, women are coy and men are just clueless--explained from the micro standpoint. Who would have guessed that all of our sexual and social behavior, and even our physical appearance, could be attributed to what our tiny unseen reproductive cells are doing? But that's Quirk's thesis in this highly entertaining book from an Average Guy that's a fun read full of a-ha! moments for scientists and civilians alike. Learn facts about cheating you'll never see on "Jerry Springer," like how unfaithful females actually change the biology of their mates. Discover why most sperm couldn't care less if they never saw an egg, what makes men yell "woo!" in a feminine falsetto--very similar to the mating cry of the Siamang gibbon--and, most important, the surprising answer on what to wear to attract that alpha mate.

From Publishers Weekly

Wild Kingdom meets Dr. Ruth in Quirk's bawdy guide to species reproduction and the differences between men and women. Each topical chapter compares romantic relationships to sociological, biological, anthropological or zoological findings, all related in Quirk's off-the-cuff prose. The easy reading can be attributed to the fact that Quirk isn't a scientist, but a fiction writer with an interest in science and a knack for finding humor in explaining why people act the way they do. Chapter titles like "Why You're So Horny" and "Why You Like Spielberg more than T.S. Eliot" set the tone for Quirk's revelations on the purpose of body hair ("It's to stink ... Now we know why the French are so sexy"); promiscuity in the animal kingdom ("the faithful sex looks drab, and the slutty sex looks fab"); and art ("I look at Michelangelo's ceiling, and I see a gay man's erotic fantasies"). Men, Quirk writes, are "sperm spreaders" bent on spraying their worthless sperm as frequently and widely as possible, while women are "womb carriers" competing against one another to land the best sperm to fertilize a precious egg. Granted, Quirk's book is far from breaking new scientific ground, but his humorous touch (not to mention the chapter on penguin prostitution) make for a readable and off-beat treatise.

Book Dimension

length: (cm)21.3 　　　 　　　　　 　　　　　 width:(cm)14.7